Communication & conflict
Articles about communication & conflict for couples: research-informed, practical and sourced. Start with the Communication and Conflict: The Complete Guide guide for the big picture.
Active Listening for Couples: Techniques That Work
Reflecting, validating and asking open questions: active-listening skills for couples, with practice scripts and a 10-minute exercise.
Updated , 9 min read
Contempt in a Relationship: Signs and Antidotes
Contempt (eye-rolling, mockery, superiority) is the most corrosive conflict pattern. Spot it early and rebuild a culture of appreciation.
Updated , 9 min read
Defensiveness in Relationships: Why It Happens & Fixes
Defensiveness feels like protection but escalates conflict. Learn its forms and the antidote: taking responsibility for even part of it.
Updated , 9 min read
Having the Same Argument Over and Over? Read This
Most recurring arguments are about differences that never fully go away. Here is how to manage them instead of re-fighting them.
Updated , 9 min read
How to Apologize to Your Partner So It Actually Lands
A real apology names the impact, takes responsibility and changes behavior. Learn the parts of a meaningful apology, with examples.
Updated , 9 min read
How to Communicate Better in a Relationship
Practical, research-backed ways to talk so your partner listens, and listen so they feel heard, with examples you can use tonight.
Updated , 10 min read
How to Resolve Conflict in a Relationship, Step by Step
A step-by-step method for working through disagreements: calm down, take turns, find shared ground and agree on one next step.
Updated , 9 min read
How to Stop Fighting With Your Partner: A Calm Guide
Caught in the same fights? Learn why couples escalate, how to pause safely, and the turn-taking method that helps you actually hear each other.
Updated , 10 min read
Rules for Fighting Fair: A Couples' Agreement
Write your own fair-fight agreement: ground rules, pause signals and repair phrases. Includes a free printable template.
Updated , 9 min read
Soft Startup: 25 Examples to Raise Issues Gently
How you start a hard conversation shapes how it ends. Use these 25 soft-startup examples to raise issues without triggering defensiveness.
Updated , 9 min read
Stonewalling in a Relationship: Signs and How to Stop
Stonewalling often comes from feeling overwhelmed, not from not caring. Learn the signs, the physiology behind it, and how to take a better break.
Updated , 9 min read
The Four Horsemen of Relationships, Explained
Criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling: what Gottman's research found, how to spot each one, and the antidote that replaces it.
Updated , 11 min read